the adventures of hungry sarah

Thursday, October 26, 2006
Last Saturday I began a diet that I would like to call the "diet where you no longer eat anything you usually do, except vegetables and begin to eat things like soy and gluten free bread". It could also be called the "diet where Sarah gets really hungry and starts losing weight because all the food she is allowed to eat tastes strange".

I have not lost weight in years. Years! And today I realized that I've lost about 4 lbs since Saturday. Probably not helping is that I've not eaten since last evenings supper, due to the fact I'm on a clear liquid diet for my scope tomorrow. I'm very hungry. I'm imagining things like shrimp fettuccine and steak and bread. BREAD! I miss bread so much. You wouldn't think that a phrase like "gluten free" would mean that much, but does it ever. Gluten is in SO much of our NA food.

Let me relate to you a little story about what being on this diet is like.

Imagine a young woman, much like me, but her name's withheld for anonymity of course. She is walking around her kitchen, which is fully stocked with food, looking for her next meal. She is (as the 'hunters and gatherers' would call it) scavenging. She picks up one of her favourite comfort foods. Campbells Tomato Soup - and is just about to open it, when she notices that the ingredients include wheat flour. So, "no more soup for you!" She goes on to make a casserole, which contains milk. That idea also gets nixed. Then she thinks of a plan, spaghetti! Too bad it has wheat in the noodles. At least she can have her weird sprouted (gluten free of course) bread toasted. But what to put on it? No butter, no margarine, no peanut butter, no jam of any kind. Sigh... - salad it is.

This whole experience has left me thinking, however. I've never realized how much I think about food. I was more upset than I would have expected about starting this diet. Eating food, and making food, and planning meals is apparently something that I didn't even know I cared about so much. I really love food. And I'm glad that I've had the chance to do this diet. Not just that I might find out more about why I'm ill, but also for revealing a hidden idol.

And the not eating today thing. Well, like the 30 hour famines I've done in the past, this is teaching me again how fortunate I am. We are. Food is such a blessing, and having a full stomach such a clear example of God's common grace. I think about children in this world who live like I'm living right now, hungry. And I wonder if I can even come close to understanding what they feel like, because I know that at 1:00pm tomorrow, I'll be eating.

ah, language.

Saturday, October 21, 2006
Watch this and enjoy.

word of God, speak.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006
"Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see Your majesty
To be still and know that You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest in Your holiness

Word of God speak
I'm finding myself in the midst of You
Beyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need is to be with You
And in the quiet hear Your voice ..."

I feel numb, like I haven't drawn near to God for so long. I want to be filled with Him today, nothing is worth anything without His presence.

give thanks

Saturday, October 07, 2006
Happy Thanksgiving Weekend, everyone.

I am so thankful this year for being able to celebrate this time of year, and our great God who gives us all so much. I have much to be thankful for, much to celebrate, and much to praise Him for.

I wrote a "my be thankful" list about a year ago; I'm including some of it here.

My Be-Thankful List
I know the God of the universe; He's my Saviour, my Friend and my reason to hope.
This world is not my home.
Kevin Van Hartingsveldt. He's everything I want, and he wants me.
The giggle of Eric.
Talents in the area of singing, writing, and listening to others.
Two Mom's and two Dad's who are supportive, loving and who challenge me.
I have a great family; awesome sisters and brothers.
A church family and a place to enjoy great teaching and worship.
My health.
Supportive friends, who I can laugh and cry with.
Girls Bible Study.
Music: the soundtrack of my life.
Sunny days.
The ability to read, to see, to think.
Deep talks with my Rach.
Knowing that good times will come again.
The chance for further education.
A home, just for me and Kev.
The cozy feeling of being in bed and knowing I have 2 more hours to sleep.
That God has given me trials.
That I am alive.

c.s. lewis: second time around

Wednesday, October 04, 2006
"If we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased."

Lord, forgive us for being far too easily pleased.

p(rayer)r(equest)

I'd really appreciate it if you guys could pray for me - I've been having a rough week physically, and ongoing for about 6 weeks now. Please pray that the doctor's will have wisdom, that God will heal me, and that most of all, His will will be done.

Also, please pray for Kev as he's had to be Mr. Mom for awhile now, and has a full plate with school.

I REEAALLY want to get over this.

Jakob's Sibling!

pregnancy